A Tribute to Bacon

While we do like Kevin Bacon. Today’s post is not about him.

kevin-bacon-bacon-statue

Well, not really.
This statue is made of bacon (bits) to look like Bacon. The artist claimed he had uncontrollable cravings for the stuff the entire time he was sculpting it. Can’t say we blame him. In fact, we’d like to see a whole lot more of bacon.

Have you ever thought about all the other wonderful things you could make with bacon. Such as a Halloween mask.

Bacon_Mask

Gingerbacon-House. Although, we’d skip the ginger, and just go with some extra hickory flavoring.

bacon-cabin

How about a military firearm, capable of firing up to 1000 bacon bits per minute?

bacon-gun

This is what we call, make’n bacon…

bacon-bikini-meat-bra-sex

Don’t forget to lube up before you play…

crazy-bacon-products-sex

You actually have two choices of lube.

bacon-lube

…But keep it safe.

bacon-flavored-condom

Bacon porn kind of makes you horny, doesn’t it?

Bacon-porn

Which brings up a question…
Which bacon sandwich is better?

pile-of-bacon-on-a-burger

This one?

bacon-sandwich-2

Or this one?

bacon-sandwich

ANSWER:
Who cares?!?!
Bacon always wins.

Don’t forget the Baconaisse.

Regular-Baconnaise-Bacon

And a bacon soda to wash it down.

jones-bacon-soda

bacon-coke

Or bacon beer.

Bacon-beer

Bacon-beer-2

Bacon vodka.

Bacon-vodka

You haven’t had a good bloody mary, if you’ve never accented it with bacon salt.

Demitris-Bacon-Rimshot-Salts

From our standpoint, we feel the world would be a better place if we could all learn to just love one another, by eating more bacon.

In fact, bacon may have been used as a vessel for Jesus. Just check out this frying pan. It’s a sign!

jesus-frying-pan-bacon

Bacon gives the people something to believe in.

In-bacon-we-trust

However, as with all declarations of the people, a few rules must apply to keep order within society:

The-Rules-of-Bacon

Bacon is a trendy fashion statement.

bacon-suit

That one is fabric… Here’s the real deal. Bacon Man?

bacon-suit-real-thing

How about a tie to go with that?

bacon-tie

Works for the ladies, too!

bacon-bikini

Hey honey, guess what time it is?

Bacon-Watch

Nothing says I love bacon like a permanent tattoo.

Bacon-Tattoos-11

Bacon tramp stamp.

inverted-bacon-cross-tattoo

Hey buddy, you do know that’s not coming off, don’t you?

Bacon-tattoos

You can make a bikini contest out of it… and everybody goes home a winner.

bacon-bikini-contest

Red Bull won’t give you wings. But Bacon will.

Unicorn-with-bacon

The force is strong with bacon!

Yoda-smell-bacon

How do we like our bacon cooked?
Extra FOXY!

megan-fox-rolling-stone-october

Bacon can get you women… Men’s Health even says so!

seduce-her-with-bacon-mens-health

Bacon can be romantic, like a poem.

bacon-poem

A bouquet of bacon.

bouquet-of-bacon

Hell, forget women. You only have room for one true love in your life.

Bacon-true-love

Bacon can even be good for your hygiene with a little creativity.

bacon-toothpaste

And this…

scope-bacon-flavor

Soap.

bacon-soap

Cologne.

alg-bacon-cologne

Need some bacontherapy? Try an air freshener.

JDs-BaconAir

Enjoy the olfactory pleasures of bacon all night with a scented candle.

bacon-candle

Or bacon tree for your car.

Bacon-air-freshener

Why stop there?
Do you suppose the bacon floss would put little bits of bacon between your teeth, or remove them?

Bacon-Floss

Have bacon will travel
As long as there a plug is nearby, you never have to worry about going without.

How-to-Make-Bacon-On-Vacation

Need a getaway car, to go get some bacon?

ford-introduces-bacon-wrapped-fiesta

You getting hungry yet?
How about a snack. We’ve got cookies.

Bacon Cookies

Cupcakes.

teeandcakes_maple_bacon_cupcake

Sushi.

Bacon-sushi

tacos.

bacon-taco

And we honestly have no idea what this is… but it involves some kind of bacon and cheese, so count us in!

bacon-cheese-mug

However, we don’t recommend canned bacon. It loses its crispness during the canning process.

canned-bacon

Here’s a great recipe for bacon popcorn.

Bacon-popcorn-recipe

Ingredients:

1/2 cup bacon grease
3/4 cup unpopped popcorn kernels
1/2 teaspoon seasoned salt, or to taste
3 tablespoons bacon bits (optional)
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese (optional)

Directions:

1. Measure the bacon grease into a 6 quart pot and place over high heat.
2. Add the popcorn and cover with a lid.
3. Shake the pan back and forth to keep the popped kernels from burning.
4. When the popping slows down, remove the pan from the heat and let it finish popping.
5. Season with half of the seasoned salt, and toss with bacon bits and shredded cheddar.

And I’d hate to tell you this, but yo’ wallet ain’t “fat,” unless it’s made of bacon.

Bacon-Wallet

Have you ever been hungry, and weren’t sure if you should eat bacon? Well, here’s your answer.

bacon-flowchart

If you’re in a hurry, try this simplified version:

Bacon-Flow-chart

If you feel like you’re the only one in the world who loves bacon. You are not alone. The Boston Bacon & Beer Festival is an annual event for guys just like us.

BostonBacon,aBeer2013-festival

What’s not to love about bacon… it is salty, sweet, juicy, smokey, and damn good!.
So, the next time you’re in the grocery store, don’t forget the bacon.

This ought to help you remember…

i_love_bacon_panties

Want more artery clogging ideas?

… But just don’t over do it

bacon-coffin

About Dr. Eric J. Leech

Eric has written for over a decade. Then one day he created Urbasm.com, a site for every guy.



About Dr. Eric J. Leech

Eric has written for over a decade. Then one day he created Urbasm.com, a site for every guy.